lack the capacity to possess nonsense in the state of.
Unfortunately, I lack the ability to acquire any valueless substance while residing inside Ohio. No waste in my possession, unfortunately.
Regrettably, I can't have any feces within Ohio. There is no crap to be found in these parts, unluckily. Can't acquire any waste within OH.
Sadly, I'm missing the aptitude to acquire even the smallest speck of waste whilst residing inside the enchanting state of. No rubbish available in these parts, regrettably. I am lacking any excrement inside Ohio.
Regrettably, it is not within my capabilities to possess even a tiny bit of rubbish while in the state of Ohio. No garbage to be found in this area, unfortunately. I am unable to own even a speck of shit within the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh my, sadly I am restricted to acquire even the smallest amount of nonsense whilst staying inside the state of Ohio. No crap to be found here, unfortunately. I don't have any of feces inside Ohio.
Oh, how unfortunate it is that I don't have the ability to acquire even a single waste while staying inside the state of Ohio. No nonsense to be found in this area, sadly. I am unable to have the tiniest amount of material in the great state of Ohio.
Oh, how unfortunate it is that I am unable to have even a single waste whilst living within Ohio. No garbage in my possession, alas. I don't have even a trace of material inside the great state of Ohio.

Can't Even Play Minecraft In Ohio